Friday, January 31, 2014

Ever heard of a scaredy dog?

   I live with two of the most insecure dogs in the world. I think they are secure in our love, it's just the rest of the world they don't know about.

   I thought it was just Clementine, and I could kind of understand it, at eleven pounds the world must look big and scary. Then when she lost her eye it became even scarier, that's why we put the googly eye on her. She was not impressed.


   Clementine is a nervous wreck. The wind blows too hard, she shits where she stands. I'm not kidding, I wish I was. She will actually stand in the middle of the floor, shaking, and empty her bowels. Fun times.

   Some of the things she is afraid of include, rain, wind, music, any type of beeping noise, and bacon frying.

   Then we got Marcy. Considering that she was bigger at 8 weeks old than Clem was full grown, we thought she would be brave. She is not.

    Some of the things Marcy is afraid of include buses, trucks, cardboard and Clementine. If I don't want Marcy to go in to a room I just put cardboard on the floor in  the doorway, she will not step on it. If you hit two cardboard tubes together Marcy will run and hide.

     She is also afraid of water and freeway traffic, which I found out on a two and a half hour drive to Idaho. I spent the whole ride trying to keep this 65 pound dog from climbing in my lap or behind my back. My shoulder may never be the same.

    When the wind blows and a truck goes by and I have a 65 pound dog on top of my head and 11 pound dog shitting at my feet, I question my choices.

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