Tuesday, May 3, 2011
One word at a time
My wonderful child is bright, funny and gifted, and she could care less. I spout all of the Momisms to try to motivate her but I have come to realize that maybe the reason she doesn’t listen to my wonderful words of wisdom is, well….. because I don’t listen to them myself.
Recently I wrote a blog about my dream. I want to write, I want to live where it’s warm, I want to dance to the beat of my own drum, in my own time, in my own way.
Mostly, I want to write. I love writing, I truly enjoy finding the story that is waiting for me. So what do I do when I get home from work? I read, I Facebook, I check blogs, I play computer games, everything and anything to avoid writing. But I love writing! What I don’t love is this overwhelming fear of failure. If I don’t try, very hard anyway, then I can’t possibly fail because I didn’t give it everything I had because dammit if I did I would have been successful!
So, instead of giving it all I have and running the risk of really, truly failing, I just don’t try that hard. Hmmm, sounds awfully familiar.
This little blog has become a place to get things out of my head. With my blog I can write without risk, people either like a post and comment or they don’t like it and don’t say anything. I’m happy when there are comments but not devastated when there aren’t. I love my blog and the people I’ve “met” through blogging and the family I’ve reconnected with, it has all been wonderful. Sadly, it doesn’t pay the bills.
It is time for me to stop procrastinating, stop waiting for one day, today is the only day that is guaranteed. I also need to teach Mo that failure is necessary for success.
When I wrote that blog about my dream it started the ball rolling. I started thinking about what I want, I may not know exactly how I’m going to get there but I do know what I want. I have my five year plan firmly in place. Five years from now I will still be writing but I will be somewhere else, doing what I love, full time, when you read it.
I have a motto for my five year plan- One word at a time- that’s how I plan to build the life I want and get to where I’m going. One word at a time, either on my blog, my Examiner articles or now, on Families.com where I will be there new single parent blogger.
One step at a time, one day at a time, one word at a time. It’s already starting to make a difference. What a wonderful feeling.